世界上最优美的散文--人生短篇-第21章
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那样对他们关心备至，你就 可能成为他们的负担，除非他们特别冷漠。我不是说对他们应该不闻不问，但是你所给予的 关心应是理『性』的，解囊相助的（如果可能的话），而非过于感情冲动。动物在自己的后代一 旦能够生活自理时，就不再给予照顾，可是人类，因为幼年时期太长，很难做到这一点。
我觉得一个人能做到对合适的活动兴趣盎然、不理会自己的个人得失，那么，他就很容 易享有成功的晚年，因为经过长期积累的经验在此可以结出累累的硕果，而经过经验产生的 智慧在这个时候既有用武之地，而又不至咄咄『逼』人。叫已经长大成人的孩子不要犯错误是没 有好处的，因为他们不会信任你，同时也由于犯错误是接受教育的不可缺少的一环。但如果 你做不到不计个人得失，那么，不将你的心放在儿孙后辈身上，你便会觉得生活空虚无聊。
如果是这样，你必须知道：尽管你还能给他们物质上的帮助，诸如给点补贴或织几件『毛』 衣，可是你千方不要指望他们会喜欢跟你在一起。
有些老人为死的恐惧所困扰。假如年轻人有这种恐惧，那也没有什么可说的。年轻人有 理由害怕战死在战场上；但当他们想到被骗走了生命所能赋予的美好生活时，他们有理由表 示不满。但假如对于一个尝尽人间疾苦，已经完成该做的一切的老年人来讲，怕死就有点不 大好了。
克服这种恐惧的最好办法是——至少在我看来是这样的——使你的爱好逐渐扩大，越来 越超出个人的范围，最后你的自我之墙将一点一点地退却，你的生命将越来越和人类的生命 融合在一起。一个人的一生应该像一条河——开始很小，被两岸紧紧约束，激烈地冲过岩石 和瀑布。渐渐地它变宽了，两岸退却了，河水静静地流着。到最后；不经过任何可见的停留 ，就和大海汇合在一起，毫无痛苦地失去它自身的存在。一个在老年能这样对待生活的人， 将不会感到死亡的恐惧，因为他所关心的事物将继续下去。假如由于生命力的减退，倦意日 增，安息的想法也许就是可喜之处。我希望我能死于工作之时，并且在我快死的时候能知道 别人将继续做我不能再做的工作，同时能为自己已完成力所能及的一切而心满意足。
how to grow old
bertrand russell
psychologically there are two dangers to be guarded against in old age。 one of these is undue absorption in the past。 it does not do to live in memories； in regrets for the good old days； or in sadness about friends who are dead。 one's thoughts must be directed to the future； and to things about which there is some thing to be done。 this is not always easy； one's own past is a gradually increas ing weight。 it is easy to think to oneself that one's emotions used to be more v ivid than they are； and one's mind more keen。 if this is true it should be forgo tten； and if it is forgotten it will probably not be true。
the other thing to be avoided is clinging to youth in the hope of sucking vi gour from its vitality。 when your children are grown up they want to live their own lives； and if you continue to be as interested in them as you were when they were young； you are likely to become a burden to them； unless they are unusuall y callous — i do not mean that one should be without interest in them； but one' s interest should be contemplative and； if possible； philanthropic； but not undu ly emotional。animals become indifferent to their young as soon as their young ca n look after themselves； but human beings； owing to the length of infancy； find this difficult。
i think that a sucomessful old age is easiest for those who have strong imper sonal interests involving appropriate activities。 it is in this sphere that long experience is really fruitful； and it is in this sphere that the wisdom born of experience can be exercised without being oppressive。 it is no use telling grow nup children not to make mistakes； both because they will not believe you； and b ecause mistakes are an essential part of education。 but if you are one of those who are incapable of impersonal interests； you may find that your life will be e mpty unless you concern yourself with your children and grandchildren。 in that c ase you must realize that while you can still render them material services； suc h as making them an allowance or knitting them jumpers； you must not expect that they will enjoy your company。
some old people are oppressed by the fear of death。 in the young there is a justification for this feeling。 young men who have reason to fear that they will be killed in battle may justifiably feel bitter in the thought that they have b een cheated of the best things that life has to offer。 but in an old man who has known human joys and sorrows； and has achieved whatever work it was in him to d o； the fear of death is somewhat abject and ignoble。
the best way to overcome it — so at least it seems to me — is to make your interests gradually wider and more impersonal； until bit by bit the walls of th e ego recede； and your life becomes increasingly merged in the universal life。 a n individual human existence should be like a river — small at first； narrowly contained within its banks； and rushing passionately past rocks and over waterfa lls。 gradually the river grows wider； the banks recede； the waters flow more qui etly； and in the end； without any visible break； they become merged in the sea； and painlessly lose their individual being。 the man who； in old age； can see his life in this way； will not suffer from the fear of death； since the things he c ares for will continue。 and if； with the decay of vitality； weariness increases； the thought of rest will not be unwelcome。 i should wish to die while still at work； knowing that others will carry on what i can no longer do and content in t he thought that what was possible has been done。
论招人厌烦的人
罗伯特。林德
罗伯特。林德（1879—1949），英国近代散文名家，生于爱尔兰，曾任伦敦《新闻报》文 学编辑，工作之余著述颇丰，在散文创作方面有较高成就。
我有时觉得，那种最招人厌烦的人就是那种喜欢跟人讲从一个地方到另一地方有多少条 路好走的人。我一生中感到最厌烦的一回，是听一位老先生向一位上年纪的女人讲解，她从 拿丁山门回汉普斯台可能走的全部街道。她曾向他抱怨说她走的那条路太费时间。于是，他 一大串的絮絮叨叨便开了头，其中包括所有的公共汽车路线、街道名和站名。接下来，他用 一种平铺直叙的语调指点给她整个西部和北部伦敦的每一条路。他奉告给她所有可以换车地 方的地名，并且还为她一一详述一路上所有的酒店名字。最后我感觉到，他好像连他自己也 被弄烦了，至于我们旁人就更不用说了；但他还是不敢把话停下来，想来或许因为他再没有 别的什么好谈了。等到最后他起身走开时，我早已陷入昏『迷』状态，什么卡门敦大街、威尔土 亲王路以及不列颠街等等之类街名在我的脑海中不断碰撞，『乱』作一团。
另外一种讨人厌烦的谈话方式是这样一种人的谈话方式。这种人一谈起政治来，就把所 有陈词滥调的议论全都抖搂出来，那神气活像他是第一次使用它们。我自己就一向是这类讨 人厌烦的人。年轻的时候，我因为认识不清，曾误以为格莱斯顿先生的爱尔兰自治提案是危 险和有害的，于是每次遇见我那位倡议地方自治的好朋友时，我总爱把话扯到那个大问题上 去。路上并肩走着的时候，我便往他的耳朵里搪塞那最荒唐的糊涂话，目光炯炯地为他讲述 了历来英国对爱尔兰的全部德政，并向他大声疾呼那些从自治之前的格莱斯顿以及威廉。哈 尔考特爵士那里引来的尽人皆知的陈腐语言。我从来没有发过一点新鲜议论，因为我对此一 无所知。我像一只被激怒了的鹦鹉，只知道重复一大堆可以想见的愚昧无知话语。就连他那 张很有耐『性』的脸孔上的痛苦表情也不能让我停止。但是有一天，他实在忍无可忍，突然脸上 一红，对着我冷冷来了一句：“我的天，你真是个够讨厌的人。”当然，谁也不愿意被人当 成讨厌的人，而对一个当面说你讨厌的人，你便很难继续再和他辩论下去了。当我们了解到 自己在招人厌烦时，我们就像泄气的气球。我当时的情况就是这样。拉。罗施夫考曾说过： “我们能原谅那些使我们感到厌烦的人，但不能原谅感到我们厌烦的人。”不过震动一过， 我倒没有因为友人的坦率而减少了我对他的友情。从那次以后我肯定还曾经招不少人厌烦过 ；但是除了家里人之外，一直倒还没有人向我讲过我讨他们厌烦。我得认真研究别人的面部 表情才能知道我是否在招他们厌烦……
on being a bore
robert lynd
the worst bores； i sometimes think； are those who love telling people the va rious routes from one place to another。i have never been more bored in my life t han when listening to an old gentleman explaining to an old lady the several way s in which she might have come from notting hill gate to hampstead。she had compl ained of the time the journey had taken and immediately he was off on a long rig marole consisting of the number of buses and the frames of streets and stations。 he went on in a flat voice conducting her； as it seemed to me； through every str eet in west and north london。 he told her of all the various places where she mi ght have changed buses and named most of the publichouses on the way。in the en d； it seemed to me； he was boring himself as well as the rest of us； but he dare d not stop； i fancy； because he could think of nothing else to talk about。by the time he rose to go i was in a coma with words like camden high street； prince o f wales road and britannia jostling each other in my brain。
another boring form of conversation is that of the man who； when talking pol itics； trots out all the old threadbare arguments withs the air of a person usin g them for the first time。i have been a bore of this kind myself。 as a boy i was blind enough to regard mr。gladstone's proposal of home rule for ireland as bots dangerous and wicked； and； whenever i met a great friend of mine who was a home ruler； i would drag the conversation round to the great theme。i shouted the wil dest nonsense into his ear as i walked beside him in the streets； telling him wi th blazing eyes of all the good england had done to ireland and yelling all the usual musty quotations from the prehomerule gladstone and sir willi
