THE AMBER SPYGLASS-第56章

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n　here　otherwise。。。〃

〃well；〃　he　said；　〃i　dunno。　maybe　i　wouldve　got　dead　some　other　way。　but　it　werent　your　fault；　lyra；　see。〃

she　felt　herself　beginning　to　believe　it；　but　all　the　same；　it　was　heartrending　to　see　the　poor　little　cold　thing；　so　close　and　yet　so　out　of　reach。　she　tried　to　grasp　his　wrist；　though　her　fingers　closed　in　the　empty　air；　but　he　understood　and　sat　down　beside　her。

the　other　ghosts　withdrew　a　little；　leaving　them　alone；　and　will　moved　apart；　too；　to　sit　down　and　nurse　his　hand。　it　was　bleeding　again；　and　while　tialys　flew　fiercely　at　the　ghosts　to　force　them　away；　salmakia　helped　will　tend　to　the　wound。

but　lyra　and　roger　were　oblivious　to　that。

〃and　you　ent　dead；〃　he　said。　〃howd　you　e　here　if　youre　still　alive？　and　wheres　pan？〃

〃oh；　roger；　i　had　to　leave　him　on　the　shore；　it　was　the　worst　thing　i　ever　had　to　do；　it　hurt　so　much；　you　know　how　it　hurts；　and　he　just　stood　there；　just　looking；　oh；　i　felt　like　a　murderer；　roger；　but　i　had　to；　or　else　i　couldnt　have　e！〃

〃i　been　pretending　to　talk　to　you　all　the　time　since　i　died；〃　he　said。　〃i　been　wishing　i　could；　and　wishing　so　hard。。。just　wishing　i　could　get　out；　me　and　all　the　other　dead　uns；　cause　this　is　a　terrible　place；　lyra；　its　hopeless；　theres　no　change　when　youre　dead；　and　them　bird…things。。。　you　know　what　they　do？　they　wait　till　youre　resting；　you　cant　never　sleep　properly；　you　just　sort　of　doze；　and　they　e　up　quiet　beside　you　and　they　whisper　all　the　bad　things　you　ever　did　when　you　was　alive；　so　you　cant　forget　em。　they　know　all　the　worst　things　about　you。　they　know　how　to　make　you　feel　horrible；　just　thinking　of　all　the　stupid　things　and　bad　things　you　ever　did。　and　all　the　greedy　and　unkind　thoughts　you　ever　had；　they　know　em　all；　and　they　shame　you　up　and　they　make　you　feel　sick　with　yourself。。。　but　you　cant　get　away　from　em。〃

〃well；〃　she　said；　〃listen。〃

dropping　her　voice　and　leaning　closer　to　the　little　ghost；　just　as　she　used　to　do　when　they　were　planning　mischief　at　jordan；　：　she　went　on：

〃you　probably　dont　know；　but　the　witches；　you　remember　serafina　pekkala；　the　witchesve　got　a　prophecy　about　me。　they　dont　know　i　know；　no　one　does。　i　never　spoke　to　anyone　about　it　before。　but　when　i　was　in　trollesund；　and　farder　coram　the　gyptian　took　me　to　see　the　witches　consul；　dr。　lanselius；　he　gave　me　like　a　kind　of　a　test。　he　said　i　had　to　go　outside　and　pick　out　the　right　piece　of　cloud…pine　out　of　all　the　others　to　show　i　could　really　read　the　alethiometer。

〃well；　i　done　that；　and　then　i　came　in　quickly；　because　it　was　cold　and　it　only　took　a　second；　it　was　easy。　the　consul　was　talking　to　farder　coram；　and　they　didnt　know　i　could　hear　em。　he　said　the　witches　had　this　prophecy　about　me；　i　was　going　to　do　something　great　and　important；　and　it　was　going　to　be　in　another　world。。。

〃only　i　never　spoke　of　it；　and　i　reckon　i　must　have　even　forgot　it；　there　was　so　much　else　going　on。　so　it　sort　of　sunk　out　of　my　mind。　i　never　even　talked　about　it　with　pan；　cause　he　would　have　laughed；　i　reckon。

〃but　then　later　on　mrs。　coulter　caught　me　and　i　was　in　a　trance；　and　i　was　dreaming　and　i　dreamed　of　that；　and　i　dreamed　of　you。　and　i　remembered　the　gyptian　boat　mother；　ma　costa；　you　remember；　it　was　their　boat　we　got　on　board　of；　in　jericho；　with　simon　and　hugh　and　them。。。”

〃yes！　and　we　nearly　sailed　it　to　abingdon！　that　was　the　best　thing　we　ever　done；　lyra！　i　wont　never　forget　that；　even　if　im　down　here　dead　for　a　thousand　years。。。”

〃yes；　but　listen；　when　i　ran　away　from　mrs。　coulter　the　first　time；　right；　i　found　the　gyptians　again　and　they　looked　after　me　and。。。　oh；　roger；　theres　so　much　i　found　out；　youd　be　amazed；　but　this　is　the　important　thing：　ma　costa　said　to　me；　she　said　id　got　witch…oil　in　my　soul；　she　said　the　gyptians　were　water　people　but　i　was　a　fire　person。

〃and　what　i　think　that　means　is　she　was　sort　of　preparing　me　for　the　witch…prophecy。　i　know　i　got　something　important　to　do；　and　dr。　lanselius　the　consul　said　it　was　vital　i　never　found　out　what　my　destiny　was　till　it　happened；　see；　i　must　never　ask　about　it。。。　so　i　never　did。　i　never　even　thought　what　it　might　be。　i　never　asked　the　alethiometer；　even。

〃but　now　i　think　i　know。　and　finding　you　again　is　just　a　sort　of　proof。　what　i　got　to　do；　roger；　what　my　destiny　is；　is　i　got　to　help　all　the　ghosts　out　of　the　land　of　the　dead　forever。　me　and　will；　we　got　to　rescue　you　all。　im　sure　its　that。　it　must　be。　and　because　lord　asriel；　because　of　something　my　father　said。。。　death　is　going　to　die；　he　said。　i　dunno　whatll　happen；　though。　you　mustnt　tell　em　yet；　promise。　i　mean　you　might　not　last　up　there。　but。。。”

he　was　desperate　to　speak；　so　she　stopped。

〃thats　just　what　i　wanted　to　tell　you！〃　he　said。　〃i　told　em；　all　the　other　dead　uns；　i　told　them　youd　e！　just　like　you　came　and　rescued　the　kids　from　bolvangar！　i　says；　lyrall　do　it；　it　anyone　can。　they

wished　itd　be　true；　they　wanted　to　believe　me；　but　they　never　really　did；　i　could　tell。

〃for　one　thing；〃　he　went　on；　〃every　kid　thats　ever　e　here；　every　single　one；　starts　by　saying；　i　bet　my　dadll　e　and　get　me；　or　i　bet　my　mum；　as　soon　as　she　knows　where　i　am；　shell　fetch　me　home　again。　if　it　ent　their　dad　or　mum；　its　their　friends；　or　their　grandpa；　but　someones　going　to　e　and　rescue　em。　only　they　never　do。　so　no　one　believed　me　when　i　told　em　youd　e。　only　i　was　right！〃

〃yeah；〃　she　said；　〃well；　i　couldnt　have　done　it　without　will。　thats　will　over　there；　and　thats　the　chevalier　tialys　and　the　lady　salmakia。　theres　so　much　to　tell　you；　roger。。。〃

〃whos　will？　wheres　he　e　from？〃

lyra　began　to　explain；　quite　unaware　of　how　her　voice　changed；　how　she　sat　up　straighter；　and　how　even　her　eyes　looked　different　when　she　told　the　story　of　her　meeting　with　will　and　the　fight　for　the　subtle　knife。　how　could　she　have　known？　but　roger　noticed；　with　the　sad；　voiceless　envy　of　the　unchanging　dead。

meanwhile；　will　and　the　gallivespians　were　a　little　way　off；　talking　quietly。

〃what　are　you　going　to　do；　you　and　the　girl？〃　said　tialys。

〃open　this　world　and　let　the　ghosts　out。　thats　what　ive　got　the　knife　for。〃

he　had　never　seen　such　astonishment　on　any　faces；　let　alone　those　of　people　whose　good　opinion　he　valued。　hed　acquired　a　great　respect　for　these　two。　they　sat　silent　for　a　few　moments；　and　then　tialys　said：

〃this　will　undo　everything。　its　the　greatest　blow　you　could　strike。　the　authority　will　be　powerless　after　this。〃

〃how　would　they　ever　suspect　it？〃　said　the　lady。　〃itll　e　at　them　out　of　nowhere！〃

〃and　what　then？〃　tialys　asked　will。

〃what　then？　well；　then　well　have　to　get　out　ourselves；　and　find　our　daemons；　i　suppose。　dont　think　of　then。　its　enough　to　think　of　now。　i　havent　said　anything　to　the　ghosts；　in　case…；　in　case　it　doesnt　work。　so　dont　you　say　anything；　either。　now　im　going　to　find　a　world　i　can　open；　and　those　harpies　are　watching。　so　if　you　want　to　help；　you　can　go　and　distract　them　while　i　do　that。〃

instantly　the　gallivespians　urged　their　dragonflies　up　into　the　murk　overhead；　where　the　harpies　were　as　thick　as　blowflies。　will　watched　the　great　insects　charging　fearlessly　up　at　them；　for　all　the　world　as　if　the　harpies　were　flies　and　they　could　snap　them　up　in　their　jaws；　big　as　they　were。　he　thought　how　much　the　brilliant　creatures　would　love　it　when　the　sky　was　open　and　they　could　skim　about　over　bright　water　again。

then　he　took　up　the　knife。　and　instantly　there　came　back　the　words　the　harpies　had　thrown　at　him；　taunts　about　his　mother；　and　he　stopped。　he　put　the　knife　down；　trying　to　clear　his　mind。

he　tried　again；　with　the　same　result。　he　could　hear　them　clamoring　above；　despite　the　ferocity　of　the　gallivespians；　there　were　so　many　of　them　that　two　fliers　alone　could　do　little　to　stop　them。

well；　this　was　what　it　was　going　to　be　like。　it　wasnt　going　to　get　any　easier。　so　will　let　his　mind　relax　and　bee　disengaged；　and　just　sat　there　with　the　knife　held　loosely　until　he　was　ready　again。

this　time　the　knife　cut　straight　into　the　air；　and　met　rock。　he　had　opened　a　window　in　this　world　into　the　underground　of　another。　he　closed　it　up　and　tried　again。

and　the　same　thing　happened；　though　he　knew　it　was　a　different　world。　hed　opened　windows　before　to　find　himself　above　the　ground　of　another　world；　so　he　shouldnt　have　been　surprised　to　find　he　was　underground　for　a　change；　but　it　was　disconcerting。

next　time　he　felt　carefully　in　the　way　hed　learned；　letting　the　tip　search　for　the　resonance　that　revealed　a　world　where　the　ground　was　in　the　same　place。　but　the　touch　was　wrong　wherever　he　felt。　there　was　no　world　anywhere　he　could　open　into；　everywhere　he　touched；　it　was　solid　rock。

lyra　had　sensed　that　something　was　wrong；　and　she　jumped　up　from　her　close　conversation　with　rogers　ghost　to　hurry　to　wills　side。

〃what　is　it？〃　she　said　quietly。

he　told　her；　and　added；　〃were　going　to　have　to　move　somewhere　else　before　i　can　find　a　world　we　can　open　into。　and　those　harpies　arent　going　to　let　us。　have　you　told　the　ghosts　what　we　were　planning？〃

〃no。　only　roger；　and　i　told　him　to　keep　it　quiet。　hell　do　whatever　i　tell　him。　oh；　will；　im　scared；　im　so　scared。　we　might　not　ever　get　out。　suppose　we　get　stuck　here　forever？〃

〃the　knife　can　cut　throu