And Now, And Here-第36章

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in　fact；　only　the　ego　can　die；　only　the　ego　has　a　death　……　because　it　is　false。

it　will　have　to　die。

but　we　are　holding　on　to　it。

for　example；　a　wave　rises　in　an　ocean。

if　the　wave　wants　to　survive　as　a　wave；　it　cannot；　it　is　bound　to　die。

how　can　a　wave　survive　as　a　wave？　it　will　die。

unless；　of　course；　it　bees　ice。

if　it　contracts；　bees　solid；　then　it　can　survive。

but　still；　in　that　sort　of　survival　the　wave　is　no　more　and　the　ice　remains　……　ice　which　is　a　wave；　closed；　broken　away　from　the　ocean。

remember；　as　a　wave　it　is　not　apart　from　the　ocean；　it　is　one　with　the　ocean。

as　ice；　it　parts　from　the　ocean；　it　separates；　it　bees　solid。

in　it；　the　wave　has　contracted；　it　has　bee　frozen。

as　a　wave　it　was　one　with　the　ocean；　however；　if　it　bees　a　chunk　of　ice　it　will　survive；　of　course；　but　then　it　will　be　cut　off　from　the　ocean。

and　how　long　will　it　survive　in　that　state？　whatsoever　is　frozen　will　undoubtedly　melt。

a　poor　wave　will　melt　a　little　sooner；　while　a　rich　wave　will　take　a　little　longer　……　what　else？　the　sunrays　will　take　a　little　longer　to　melt　a　big　wave；　while　a　smaller　wave　will　melt　sooner。

it　is　only　a　question　of　time；　but　melting　is　bound　to　happen。

the　wave　will　melt　and　it　will　make　a　big　hue　and　cry；　because　as　soon　as　it　melts　it　will　disappear。

but　if　the　wave；　by　falling　back　into　the　ocean；　were　to　make　itself　cease　to　exist　as　separate；　if　it　were　to　e　to　know　that　it　is　in　fact　the　ocean；　then　there　wouldnt　be　any　question　of　the　waves　disappearing。

then　whether　it　disappears　or　remains；　it　still　exists　……　because　it　knows　that　〃i　am　not　a　wave；　i　am　the　ocean。

〃　when　it　disappears　as　a　wave；　it　still　exists　……　in　a　state　of　rest。

when　it　rises；　it　is　in　a　state　of　activity。

and　resting　is　no　less　enjoyable　than　being　active。

in　fact；　it　is　even　more　enjoyable。

there　is　a　state　of　activity　and　there　is　a　state　of　rest。

what　we　call　samsara；　the　world；　is　the　state　of　activity；　and　what　we　call　moksha；　liberation；　is　the　state　of　rest。

it　is　like　a　restless　wave　which　crashes　against　the　wind　and　wrestles　with　it；　and　then　it　falls　back　into　the　ocean　and　disappears。

it　still　exists。

whatever　it　was　before　in　the　ocean；　it　is　now　still　the　same；　but　it　is　at　rest。

however；　if　a　wave　were　to　assert　itself　as　a　wave；　it　would　be　filled　with　ego；　and　then　it　would　want　to　break　itself　away　from　the　ocean。

once　you　get　the　idea　that　〃i　am；〃　then　how　can　you　be　with　the　rest　of　the　all？　if　you　choose　to　be　with　the　all；　then　the　i　is　lost。

thats　why　the　i　insists；　〃break　away　from　the　all。

〃　and　how　interesting　it　is；　that　breaking　away　from　the　whole　makes　you　miserable。

and　then；　once　again；　the　〃i〃　says；　〃relate　with　the　all〃　……　such　is　the　tortuous　way　of　the　〃i〃。

first　the　〃i〃　says；　〃break　yourself　away　from　the　all；　isolate　yourself；　you　are　different　from　the　whole。

how　can　you　remain　connected？〃　so　the　〃i〃　snaps　itself　away；　but　then　it　gets　into　trouble　……　because；　as　soon　as　the　〃i〃　separates　from　the　all；　it　bees　miserable；　its　end　approaches。

as　soon　as　the　wave　es　to　believe　it　is　separate　from　the　ocean；　it　begins　to　die；　its　death　es　nearer。

now　it　will　fall　into　the　struggle　to　protect　itself　from　death。

as　long　as　it　was　one　with　the　ocean；　there　was　no　death　at　all　……　because　the　ocean　never　dies。

remember；　an　ocean　can　be　without　a　wave　but　a　wave　cannot　exist　without　the　ocean。

you　cannot　conceive　of　a　wave　without　the　ocean　……　the　ocean　will　be　present　in　the　wave。

the　ocean；　however；　can　exist　without　a　wave。

when　they　are　an　integral　part　of　the　ocean；　all　waves　exist　in　peace　and　rest。

but　the　moment　a　wave　strives　to　save　itself　from　the　ocean；　difficulties　arise　……　it　cuts　itself　off　from　the　ocean　and　its　death　begins。

this　is　the　reason　one　who　is　to　die　wants　to　love。

the　reason　all　of　us；　who　are　going　to　die；　are　so　eager　to　love　is　that　love　is　the　obvious　means　to　connect。

thats　why　no　one　wants　to　live　without　love　and　be　miserable。

everyone　is　seeking　love：　somebody　wants　to　receive　your　love；　somebody　wants　to　give　you　love。

and　for　the　man　who　does　not　find　love　it　bees　a　problem。

but　have　we　ever　wondered　what　the　meaning　of　love　is？　

love　means　an　attempt　to　reconstruct；　once　again；　by　putting　different　parts　together；　the　relationship　we　have　broken　off　with　the　whole。

so　one　kind　of　love　is　the　one　where　we　attempt　to　rebuild　our　lost　relationship　with　the　whole　by　adding　parts。

this　is　what　we　call　love。

and　there　is　another　kind　of　love　where　we　have　stopped　our　attempts　to　break　away　from　the　whole。

that　is　called　prayer。

hence；　prayer　is　absolute　love。

and　this　carries　a　totally　different　meaning。

it　does　not　mean　that　we　are　attempting　to　integrate　the　fragments；　it　means　we　have　stopped　breaking　ourselves　away　from　the　whole。

the　wave　has　declared；　〃i　am　the　ocean；〃　and　now　it　is　not　attempting　to　connect　itself　with　each　and　every　other　wave。

remember；　the　wave　itself　is　dying；　and　the　other　waves　nearby　are　dying　too。

if　this　wave　tries　to　relate　with　other　waves；　it　will　get　into　trouble。

thats　why　our　so…called　love　is　very　painful；　because　it　is　a　wave　trying　to　relate　with　another　wave。

this　wave　and　the　other　wave　are　both　dying；　and　yet　they　get　into　a　relationship　with　each　other　in　the　hope　that　by　joining　with　each　other　they　perhaps　may　save　themselves。

thats　why　we　turn　love　into　security。

so　man　is　afraid　to　live　alone。

one　wants　a　wife；　a　husband；　a　son；　a　mother；　a　brother；　a　friend；　a　society；　an　organization；　a　nation。

these　are　all　endeavors　of　the　ego；　these　are　attempts　by　one　who　has　broken　himself　away　from　it；　to　unite　once　again　with　the　whole。

but　all　these　efforts　to　unite　are　invitations　to　death　……　because　the　one　with　whom　you　are　forming　a　union　is　as　much　surrounded　by　death；　as　much　surrounded　by　the　ego

the　funny　thing　is　that　the　other　wants　to　bee　immortal　by　uniting　with　you；　and　you　want　to　bee　immortal　by　uniting　with　the　other。

and　the　fact　is　that　both　of　you　are　going　to　die。

how　can　you　bee　immortal？　such　a　union　will　double　death；　it　will　certainly　not　turn　it　into　an　elixir。

two　lovers　long　so　much　for　their　love　to　bee　immortal　……　they　sing　songs　day　and　night。

for　eternity　poems　have　been　written　about　love　being　immortal。

how　can　two　people　who　are　going　to　die　desire　immortality　together？　a　union　of　two　such　people　only　makes　death　twice　as　real　and　nothing　else。

what　else　can　it　be？　and　both　are　melting；　sinking；　fading　away；　thats　why　they　are　frightened；　worried。

the　wave　has　created　its　own　organization。

it　says；　〃i　have　to　survive。

〃　it　has　created　nations；　it　has　created　hindu…mohammedan　sects　……　waves　creating　their　own　organizations。

and　the　fact　of　the　matter　is　that　all　these　organizations　are　going　to　disappear　……　the　ocean　below　is　the　only　organization。

and　the　organization　of　the　ocean　is　a　totally　different　thing。

belonging　to　it　does　not　mean　the　wave　joins　itself　with　the　ocean；　rather；　it　means　the　wave　knows　that　〃i　am　not　at　all　different　from　the　ocean。

〃　and　so　i　say　that　a　religious　man　does　not　belong　to　any　organization　……　he　neither　holds　to　a　family；　nor　does　he　own　a　friend；　a　father　or　a　brother。

jesus　has　spoken　some　very　strong　words。

in　fact；　only　those　who　have　attained　to　love　can　speak　such　strong　words；　people　weak　in　love　cannot　utter　them。

one　day　jesus　was　standing　in　the　market　surrounded　by　a　crowd。

his　mother；　mary；　came　to　see　him。

people　began　to　make　way　for　her。

somebody　from　the　crowd　shouted；　〃make　way；　make　room　for　jesus　mother。

let　her　e。

〃　when　jesus　heard　him；　he　said　in　a　loud　voice；　〃if　you　are　giving　way　to　jesus　mother；　then　dont　do　it；　because　jesus　doesnt　have　a　mother。

〃　mary　stopped；　stood　there　in　shock。

addressing　the　crowd；　jesus　said；　〃as　long　as　you　have　a　mother；　a　father；　a　brother；　you　wont　be　able　to　e　close　to　me。

〃　this　is　being　very　harsh。

we　cant　even　imagine　a　person　like　jesus；　so　full　of　love；　can　utter　such　words　as；　〃i　have　no　mother。

who　is　my　mother？〃　so　mary　stood　there　in　shock。

jesus　went　on；　〃do　you　call　this　woman　my　mother？　i　have　no　mother。

and　remember；　if　you　still　have　a　mother；　then　you　wont　be　able　to　e　near　me。

〃　

what　seems　to　be　the　matter？　the　question　is　that　if　a　wave　is　attempting　to　unite　with　another　wave；　it　wont　be　able　to　e　close　to　the　ocean。

waves；　in　fact；　unite　with　each　other　and　create　an　organization　mainly　to　save　themselves　from　the　ocean。

on　its　own　a　wave　feels　more　frightened　that　it　may　disappear；　that　it　may　really　disappear。

but　the　truth　is；　it　is　already　disappearing。

yet　when　a　few　waves　gather　together　they　feel　more　reassured　……　some　sort　of　organization　is　created；　a　crowd　is　created。

thats　why　man　likes　to　live　in　a　crowd；　he　feels　afraid　if　he　is　left　alone。

in　its　loneliness　a　wave　is　left　totally　by　itself　……　slipping　away；　falling　away；　vanishing；　close　to　disappearing；　feeling　alienated　on　both　sides　……　the　ocean　on　one；　the　rest　of　the　waves　on　the　other。

hence　it　creates　an　organizatio