Jane Eyre-第55章
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ree days without speaking； but last tuesday she seemed rather better： she appeared as if she wanted to say something； and kept making signs to my wife and mumbling。 it was only yesterday morning； however； that bessie understood she was pronouncing your name； and at last she made out the words； ‘bring jane—fetch jane eyre： i want to speak to her。’ bessie is not sure whether she is in her right mind； or means anything by the words； but she told miss reed and miss georgiana； and advised them to send for you。 the young ladies put it off at first； but their mother grew so restless； and said； ‘jane； jane；’ so many times； that at last they consented。 i left gateshead yesterday： and if you can get ready； miss； i should like to take you back with me early to… morrow morning。”
“yes； robert； i shall be ready： it seems to me that i ought to go。”
“i think so too； miss。 bessie said she was sure you would not refuse： but i suppose you will have to ask leave before you can get off？”
“yes； and i will do it now；” and having directed him to the servants’ hall； and remended him to the care of john’s wife； and the attentions of john himself； i went in search of mr。 rochester。
he was not in any of the lower rooms； he was not in the yard； the stables； or the grounds。 i asked mrs。 fairfax if she had seen him；—yes： she believed he was playing billiards with miss ingram。 to the billiard…room i hastened： the click of balls and the hum of voices resounded thence； mr。 rochester； miss ingram； the two misses eshton； and their admirers； were all busied in the game。 it required some courage to disturb so interesting a party； my errand； however； was one i could not defer； so i approached the master where he stood at miss ingram’s side。 she turned as i drew near； and looked at me haughtily： her eyes seemed to demand； “what can the creeping creature want now？” and when i said； in a low voice； “mr。 rochester；” she made a movement as if tempted to order me away。 i remember her appearance at the moment—it was very graceful and very striking： she wore a morning robe of sky…blue crape； a gauzy azure scarf was twisted in her hair。 she had been all animation with the game； and irritated pride did not lower the expression of her haughty lineaments。
“does that person want you？” she inquired of mr。 rochester； and mr。 rochester turned to see who the “person” was。 he made a curious grimace—one of his strange and equivocal demonstrations—threw down his cue and followed me from the room。
“well； jane？” he said； as he rested his back against the schoolroom door； which he had shut。
“if you please； sir； i want leave of absence for a week or two。”
“what to do？—where to go？”
“to see a sick lady who has sent for me。”
“what sick lady？—where does she live？”
“at gateshead； in—shire。”
“…shire？ that is a hundred miles off！ who may she be that sends for people to see her that distance？”
“her name is reed； sir—mrs。 reed。”
“reed of gateshead？ there was a reed of gateshead； a magistrate。”
“it is his widow； sir。”
“and what have you to do with her？ how do you know her？”
“mr。 reed was my uncle—my mother’s brother。”
“the deuce he was！ you never told me that before： you always said you had no relations。”
“none that would own me； sir。 mr。 reed is dead； and his wife cast me off。”
“why？”
“because i was poor； and burdensome； and she disliked me。”
“but reed left children？—you must have cousins？ sir george lynn was talking of a reed of gateshead yesterday； who； he said； was one of the veriest rascals on town； and ingram was mentioning a georgiana reed of the same place； who was much admired for her beauty a season or two ago in london。”
“john reed is dead； too； sir： he ruined himself and half…ruined his family； and is supposed to have mitted suicide。 the news so shocked his mother that it brought on an apoplectic attack。”
“and what good can you do her？ nonsense； jane！ i would never think of running a hundred miles to see an old lady who will； perhaps； be dead before you reach her： besides； you say she cast you off。”
“yes； sir； but that is long ago； and when her circumstances were very different： i could not be easy to neglect her wishes now。”
“how long will you stay？”
“as short a time as possible； sir。”
“promise me only to stay a week—”
“i had better not pass my word： i might be obliged to break it。”
“at all events you will e back： you will not be induced under any pretext to take up a permanent residence with her？”
“oh； no！ i shall certainly return if all be well。”
“and who goes with you？ you don’t travel a hundred miles alone。”
“no； sir； she has sent her coachman。”
“a person to be trusted？”
“yes； sir； he has lived ten years in the family。”
mr。 rochester meditated。 “when do you wish to go？”
“early to…morrow morning； sir。”
“well； you must have some money； you can’t travel without money； and i daresay you have not much： i have given you no salary yet。 how much have you in the world； jane？” he asked； smiling。
i drew out my purse； a meagre thing it was。 “five shillings； sir。” he took the purse； poured the hoard into his palm； and chuckled over it as if its scantiness amused him。 soon he produced his pocket… book： “here；” said he； offering me a note； it was fifty pounds； and he owed me but fifteen。 i told him i had no change。
“i don’t want change； you know that。 take your wages。”
i declined accepting more than was my due。 he scowled at first； then； as if recollecting something； he said—
“right； right！ better not give you all now： you would； perhaps； stay away three months if you had fifty pounds。 there are ten； is it not plenty？”
“yes； sir； but now you owe me five。”
“e back for it； then； i am your banker for forty pounds。”
“mr。 rochester； i may as well mention another matter of business to you while i have the opportunity。”
“matter of business？ i am curious to hear it。”
“you have as good as informed me； sir； that you are going shortly to be married？”
“yes； what then？”
“in that case； sir； adèle ought to go to school： i am sure you will perceive the necessity of it。”
“to get her out of my bride’s way； who might otherwise walk over her rather too emphatically？ there’s sense in the suggestion； not a doubt of it。 adèle； as you say； must go to school； and you； of course； must march straight to—the devil？”
“i hope not； sir； but i must seek another situation somewhere。”
“in course！” he exclaimed； with a twang of voice and a distortion of features equally fantastic and ludicrous。 he looked at me some minutes。
“and old madam reed； or the misses； her daughters； will be solicited by you to seek a place； i suppose？”
“no； sir； i am not on such terms with my relatives as would justify me in asking favours of them—but i shall advertise。”
“you shall walk up the pyramids of egypt！” he growled。 “at your peril you advertise！ i wish i had only offered you a sovereign instead of ten pounds。 give me back nine pounds； jane； i’ve a use for it。”
“and so have i； sir；” i returned； putting my hands and my purse behind me。 “i could not spare the money on any account。”
“little niggard！” said he； “refusing me a pecuniary request！ give me five pounds； jane。”
“not five shillings； sir； nor five pence。”
“just let me look at the cash。”
“no； sir； you are not to be trusted。”
“jane！”
“sir？”
“promise me one thing。”
“i’ll promise you anything； sir； that i think i am likely to perform。”
“not to advertise： and to trust this quest of a situation to me。 i’ll find you one in time。”
“i shall be glad so to do； sir； if you； in your turn； will promise that i and adèle shall be both safe out of the house before your bride enters it。”
“very well！ very well！ i’ll pledge my word on it。 you go to… morrow； then？”
“yes； sir； early。”
“shall you e down to the drawing…room after dinner？”
“no； sir； i must prepare for the journey。”
“then you and i must bid good…bye for a little while？”
“i suppose so； sir。”
“and how do people perform that ceremony of parting； jane？ teach me； i’m not quite up to it。”
“they say； farewell； or any other form they prefer。”
“then say it。”
“farewell； mr。 rochester； for the present。”
“what must i say？”
“the same； if you like； sir。”
“farewell； miss eyre； for the present； is that all？”
“yes？”
“it seems stingy； to my notions； and dry； and unfriendly。 i should like something else： a little addition to the rite。 if one shook hands； for instance； but no—that would not content me either。 so you’ll do no more than say farewell； jane？”
“it is enough； sir： as much good…will may be conveyed in one hearty word as in many。”
“very likely； but it is blank and cool—‘farewell。’”
“how long is he going to stand with his back against that door？” i asked myself； “i want to mence my packing。” the dinner…bell rang； and suddenly away he bolted； without another syllable： i saw him no more during the day； and was off before he had risen in the morning。
i reached the lodge at gateshead about five o’clock in the a
